122031 on Wednesday, November 12, 2014- today’s writing @ Veteran Writer’s Workshop
I thought Veterans day would be better
Started out lovely, that is – after I had a reason to pull myself down from the loft bed where I try to sleep
Plugging up the air vent that sends forth air infested with how many peoples second hand death… cancer – vile brainless shits – I don’t know where I am going to get oxygen clean enough to give myself the break in getting my health back, or to get it better than it is now!
But lunch – with my friend Leslie, and then who waits on us – but a long lost friend – the lovely Christina – so sushi – a wonderful loving, esteeming and encouraging friend, and by chance – the brief reconnection of my PCC friend – and this was all wonderful
It was then going back – then getting short, then noticing the icing falling off of the cake when I should have worked harder to keep the icing on, could I have worked harder in doing anything to do this
I did manage to get that email out to the gracious souls who graced me with their presence in my 5 presentation of “Love Triumphant” the art show – the Art Therapy workshops, I did 2 this time, and all the wonderful love from everyone that made that event happen, it was my best ever event, a wonderful venue, and wonderful people there – receiving the art, receiving the process, and the healing of the art – as it was created for therapy, and – seeing the response – it is received by many as a means of not just aesthetics to beautify space, but the warmth of healing as well
So I sent a thank U note out to all who attended and others I invited but they did not make it! – in that time I sunk – I get hopeless – in my helplessness to change situations that need changing, and so – well I have to get it together man!
After a long overdue time, I thought, hey, there are a few establishments that are giving Veterans free food to honor them – to honor us for our service! So I went to my favorite – but the spirit was off – I don’t know if it was the waiter – he had the right words, but I just felt he could give a fuck less, here is another fucking Veteran – … I felt like it was a fuck them and their free pizza, maybe it was just me. Maybe if I would have went to Pasadena or Glendale it would have been different, the people there do seem like they care!
Maybe it is just me, coming from skid row L.A. like I had to fight just to get out of the Ballington, and down the street so that I could get there. I ate my pizza, and drank my lemon-aid, last year the drink was free with the pizza, this year it was four dollars – the guy at the bar – I know he could really give a fuck! I felt the spirit, and still feel it… or again, maybe it is my headfuck coming out of the piss and shit, and give me a dollar, do U have any spare change – I don’t have a bit of spare change, I want so bad to get out of skid row l.a. but can’t I don’t have the money – but I do the work – I am an artist, at least I wish to be, I want to be – but it takes money to make money – that is our saying in America… of free trade – Laissez-faire = I don’t have the p.r. that Justin Bieber has, or maybe I would make it big too – like M&M and the others – I have all the ideas, and many tell me I have very beautiful and original art – and my writing, some of it is good,
Well, Veterans Day 2014, I got a hot chocolate for free from starbucks too – those women were very very nice, and backtracking, I went through a hotel to try to get to mccormick and smicks – they were very nice too, but they had a thing for veterans on Sunday I think, and then – well the guy at the hotel – 400 $’s a night I could never afford, he was very nice – really nice – told me how to get there, then we talked a bit when I came back through – so my hat is off to the nice people – genuinely human and civil to others!
Peace and Love